The past is always a large part in any person’s character. Our experiances shape us in ways that make each and every one of us unique. Suffering, joy, victories and failures… There are milestones in our lives that we base our future decisions on.

I always said that people need to suffer at some point in their life to be able to understand empathy. It’s the Knowledge that you are not the center of the universe and not everyone thinks or feels the same way as you that pushes you on to the path of understanding. From there you realise that knowing a person’s past and overcoming your own are key in succeeding in your relationships.

I do believe that I have polished this particular stone a little too much. At first I thought that it was he one stone I had to focus on. But after some introspection, I realised that I have resolved and come to terms with my past. Understanding the past to the point where I can use it as a weapon in my future.

Making a change in the world.. a change that starts from one person…

I’m not sure why I started wearing the cross again.. Part of me wonders why I left it hanging on the hook for so long and another part wonders why put it on again. A friend of mine wears his cross because he doesn’t believe anymore… Perhaps I’m afraid that one day I will fall too far away from God to ever come back. Perhaps I wish to remind myself that the cross is the one symbol I always found comfort in. Perhaps I am finally ready to stop punishing myself in solitude.

Past, Prayer, Passion, Priority, Perseverance.

That church has no cross.

… to watch the sun creep over the horizon with you.

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And now that you’re gone… all I can ever do, all I can ever hope for… is a shadow of your smile and a whisper of your voice… So long… farewell… My almost lover.

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Eagle in the dark
Feathers in the pages
Monkeys in my heart
Are rattling their cages

There is my timetable dudes! look me up for lunch ^^

I was trying to find the lyrics to this song, or even the actual title or artist but bing and google turned up nothing for me =( So I’m just gonna transcribe it from the song now. Why? Because… well.. because..

stay - Lovelikebella

Here is my heart, keep it safe it’s the only one I got
Here is my life, in your hands do I place just hold on tight
And this life can be cruel but I try
And I think we can make it if we try

Stay - unknown

I will stay.

Transitions are uncomfortable.

Sometimes painful.

But in the end the disappointment and what-if’s fade slowly into the sand.

And hope blooms once again.

Be still you fucking stupid useless ass piece of muscle. Just do your fucking job and pump my blood.

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I am looking for someone to watch district 9 with me. Any takers?

Sorry for the lack of updates… The hols seem to be the busiest time for me as opposed to my academic semesters… I actually have a huge back log of posts in my iphone, but I think it’s a little outdated and in hindsight, I think I’d rather keep those thoughts to myself… Being all dark and emo and shitz.

Quick update of whats happening in my life.

I’ve joined the crew of Radio Pulze… Not entirely sure what my role will be, but I do hope to be an interviewer/editor on the team that I am now part of… We’ll be covering POP CULTURE! How cool is that… It fits right into my love for movies and Series(I am so gonna give a shout out to Firefly and Castle).

On top of that, I’m working on a couple of concepts for businesses… I won’t divulge much but suffice to say it will be keeping me really busy while I’m in school.

Things I am going to be doing.

Updates! - My blog and the LE site have been stagnant for too long.. A combination of lack of time and motivation. Add a twitter feed… maybe. Follow me! www.twitter.com/AnttyC I expect to be updating more frequently this semester

Driven.

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I’m getting into this sem with a goal. To be more than I am. As Livia pointed out I’ve been a drifter for a long time… I guess this is the part where I say there was a life changing moment where I realise the importance of having a plan, a game for the next day. But no. Not really…

It all honesty, it’s a distraction. Being rich or comfortable is not a driving force in my life. I live to challange myself, weird for a person who dislikes competition. Everyone hates to fail, but I think the most important thing a man should know is to not be fearful of failing. Be ready to pick yourself up and keep walking.

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A hundred days have made me older, since the last time that I saw your pretty face.

All around are me are familiar faces
Worn out places, worn out faces
Bright and early for the daily races
Going nowhere, going nowhere
And their tears are filling up their glasses
No expression, no expression
Hide my head I wanna drown my sorrows
No tomorrow, no tomorrow

And I find it kind of funny,
I find it kind of sad
The dreams in which I’m dying
Are the best I’ve ever had
I find it hard to tell you
I find it hard to take
When people run in circles
It’s a very very
Mad world, Mad world
Mad world, Mad world

Mad World - Gary Jules